A few Months Before Death

Some of the stages of dying start to be discernible a few months to a month before death occurs. That is when for many of us our journey into dying begins to become more apparent.   

Some of us start feeling less active. We rest more. Doze more. Dream more. Feel more like withdrawing into our inner realms. We eat less. Drink less. Participate less in life around us.

For some of us reliving our memories becomes more important than talking to our friends or loved ones. Especially the memories of our childhood. Our memories become a way to take stock of our lives and make our peace with it, if that is what is needed.

Reduced Appetite and Increased Sleep

When our bodies are getting ready to embark on their final journey, they prepare us with a few different stages of dying. Kind of like sign posts for dying. One of them is that we are not as hungry as we used to be. We don’t need a lot of food. And it does not taste as good as it used to. What a change. We are so used to a body needing food. Every day of our lives is broken up by three meals to be prepared, consumed and cleaned up.

We also tend to sleep more when we are getting closer. It is usually not a very deep sleep. More of a gentle dozing.  One way to understand this increase of sleep is to see it as way to practice visiting the other side. That which lies beyond death. Some call it Heaven. Some call it Nirvana. Some call it Going Home.

When we sleep less we need less energy, and thus less food. Just like a tree in winter runs less sap as there are no leaves to support. Or like a bear whose metabolism slows way down when she sleeps through the cold winter months.

Our bodies are quite wonderful in this respect. They even produce particular chemicals to help us feel good when we are not eating or drinking much. Like a mild euphoria helping us relax into these stages of dying. Into our final journey.

Emotional Release

It is not uncommon for emotions to come up as one of our stages of dying. Some of us feel depressed and withdrawn, turning inward: I am done with this world. Some of us need to release feelings of anger: I am angry that I will not see the birth of my first grandchild. And some of us need to cry: I am finally able to let the tears flow I could not cry before.  As if we need to let go of excess baggage on this journey into death. The excess baggage of old emotions never felt…. of feelings never or rarely expressed… of trauma held on to.

 Sometimes it shows in our faces when we are complete. As if a curtain has been pulled aside. A curtain that had been covering up a part of ourselves. And clarity shows up in our faces. One that was not there before.